Let's start this off by saying that on the whole, I'm a strong modern girl of the new millennium. I support myself, I can buy your ass some dinner, and I can open my own jars. But just because I CAN do all of that, doesn't mean you fellas are off the hook. I am a lady, and hence, I expect to be treated with a few dignities. I'm talking basic etiquette shit here. For instance: if you are waiting for the elevator, don't try to rush in the second the door opens. If you do that, then I can't get off the elevator, so you've done nothing but complicate matters by your hasty actions. Which is just rude. Seriously man, wait a few moments to let us elevator patrons of the damn car, then you can pick whatever standing spot you want, and you can easily press your floor button without all of our bodies in your way. See, everyone wins this way. Your way just results in me shoulder checking your dumbass on my way out while I say, rather loudly, "EXCUSE ME". And if you really piss me off, I'm throwin' elbows too. Big, messy elbows that rattle your teeth. And another thing, hold the damn door open as your walking through it. I am talking to you, door-slammers! How hard is it to just pause a moment and keep the door open for a lady? About as hard as a geriatric man's wang, that's how hard. Yeah...that was gross...sorry about that. I just get all worked up when I think about all those doo doo bags who clearly see me coming, laden with bags and laptops and beverages and the like, then oh so casually allow he door to slam shut right on my mug. My stars! What kind of person treats a lady in such a fashion? A sorry sack of hobo turds, that's who. An no one wants to hang out with a sorry sack of hobo turds, no matter what your mother might have told you. And you certainly ain't gonna get to see my cookie place behaving like that! Moral of the story, if you see me, you better recognize, and you better bring the chivalry.
No comments:
Post a Comment